Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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