Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I just got carded by a ten year old.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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