the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
