we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize