Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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