Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Randomize