You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize