My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
