Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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