i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
