I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Nobody cheats on THIS.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Randomize