I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
