People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
