Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
