I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
