i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize
