if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
