i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
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