...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize
