Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
