why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
pray to the hookup gods
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
ok first of all what the fuck
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
