Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
