Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
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