Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I'm so fucking centered right now
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
