Got a toothbrush?
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Found your dick twin last night
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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