sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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