My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize