my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
The struggles of a small town man whore
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Randomize
