For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
