so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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