I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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