No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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