other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
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