Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize