Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
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