with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
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