I wish I could punch you in the face.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Randomize
