I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Randomize
