I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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