..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize
