if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
