You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize
