You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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