I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
this beer tastes like vomit already
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
