I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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