is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
