this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize