Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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