Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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