You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
