I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
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